It gave me an uneasy feeling for assessing the speaker by those harsh words and I do regret making the points so directly and ruthlessly in public which might give him a shame.
I should have commented in a contributing tone in order to encourage him instead of planting negative things regarding his speech. If only I could change the position and make it easier for the speaker because it was the first time I must evaluate someone with no experience before like how to state my comments in a positive way of expressing.
The fact that Adam and Morgwai also gave me feedback on the evaluation that I had done this afternoon in the meeting privately but simultaneously encouraged me by addressing that I had been given the most difficult task of all evaluators and done my utmost to fulfill it, there was nothing to feel uneasy for being frank with the good intention of helping others improve themselves next time.
The problem triggered in me the idea of resigning the position that I'm taking since I'm conscious of the ability that I have is not adequate to assess others regardless of how many times people suppose my English is quite excellent compared to most of Vietnamese teachers they have ever encountered through the time they have spent in my country.
From the reason, the members of organization board always supported me and hoped that I wouldn't resign just due to such a minor mistake like that. I should learn from experience and do better next time instead of avoiding it...
Sometimes, I find myself overwhelmingly sensitive and emotional, particularly the sadness of hurting someone's feelings, even a stranger's, would hit me eventually and give me bitterness, too. Yes, I'm afraid of hurting others. Indeed.
I'd better off for sleeping now. Still have an appointment with my boss at Le Petit Cafe cafeteria tomorrow!!! I was awfully exhausted and blue today... got sort of influenza this morning =;=
Good nite,
Hal
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