It's almost 01 am but I can't catch some sleep right now for thinking too much about the British culture examination this afternoon. To me, it was such a disaster since I was incapable of completing the whole questions due to taking the exam without a watch.
Blame on me for being so careless and subjective as paying less attention on the limited time on the paper until the supervisor reminded me five minutes left from the source of time, I initially wrote the essay in a hurry.
At least, I did my utmost to do research and cram the book as thick as a dictionary with hopes up to get the high score for this exam in spite of the fact that I merely worked hard in a very short term due to the trip to Saigon. This is the price I have to pay for those days being care-free :))
Low scores in this university unlikely matters to me, though I would like to get the scholarship to meet my parents' expectation and decrease the tuition for the next semester to the least. I felt indeed disappointed and regretful.
Anyway, no sooner had we finished the examination, Aileen and I decided to have a good treat and to "celebrate" a mini party for my homecoming ==" It shouldn't have to become that exaggerated! We had light-hearted conversation with each other, certainly regarding her current boyfriend and my stuff in Saigon.
That hook-up led me to the complicated state of mind for now. Perhaps, I felt a little self-pity and uneasy to encounter series of dramas in life simultaneously and had no idea how to deal with them while getting totally lost and blank that is detrimental to my mental state of mind.
Although I'm going to take several tests on the following week and plenty of final examinations the weeks after that, there's none of concentration and wise in my brain at the moment. What's wrong with me?
I'm overly worried and terrified of studying in time...This is the first time I feel this way. It's tedious! I found myself doing a load of crap but having to surrender my fate and deal with it.
I hate this education system. Again. I despise this school including some hypocrites and benefit-suckers around. Don't expect me to wave at them and be nice again! Yeah, I've changed on the account of maturity.
*sigh*
It's too late to stay up :( I virtually burned the whole previous night =.= Hallie, are you killing yourself by this way? >.<
Nite nite,
~ Hal
PS: it's tiring... :-<
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