Piano and the first time

Dear Joanna,

Thanks to your coming into my life, it's watered my barren soul :) I've truly fallen in love with you for years since I was just a little girl around him to see how hard he'd deal with you.

Your existence to me is not something new. Though the feeling of a listener is completely different from the wonderful sense of a pianist.

There are so many things called "the first time" about you that I  never ever recognized as I was simply a listener.

The first time I've just been under the impression that my fingers are not mine anymore

The first time I've learned how to control myself

The first time I've been being so bloody patient with something that much. I'd cry for getting too tired to deal with you because my fingers were ache like hell and no matter how hard I tried, it didn't work.

The first time I've known you at the other side of your beauty :) non-stop struggles.

The first time I've been doing something around at church in spite of a Catholic :)) I'm a Buddhist.

The first time soeur taught me this lesson " Learning piano reflects how you cope up with life. If you can't overcome this struggle, you'd never be able to do it with others. Life is as hard and tough as learning piano, don't give up and keep your patience..your efforts here will be rewarded someday."

The first time my personality has been hold, stayed calm and got soft.

The first time I could see the haven of peace and serenity for real away from the bustle of life out there.

The first time I've seen white so clearly like this

The first time my rage seems to be under my control. Yup, piano is like life, if I let the angry monster inside me grow, it'd burn and destroy everything. 

Of course, it's impossible for me to afford an upright piano at home to practise, though I'll be patient to learn it at church as many weekdays as possible. 

Even though I don't dabble, I'm not gonna become a pianist either lolz~ I just follow where my heart leads me to and I reckon this is the right thing, eh?!

Well, I'm neither a rich lady nor a princess to think of something so luxurious like this. The point is I just thirst to complete myself. That's all.

By the way, Joanna is a slang word to call "piano". In my opinon, if we name something, we'd treat and love it like a human and naturally what comes from the heart goes to the heart.

hallielujah~

Chéri, I miss the sight of your back when you were seated at the piano, playing me the instrument "Romance"...